PoMo Freakshow Productions

I can never ever forget how powerful it was for me to see out queer folks when I was a  closeted teen. They were risking safety and livelihood  to be out in that conservative county I was raised in. I fed on their bravery. Seeing them was food for my starving soul. I would count the long weekend hours until Monday morning when I would see the dyke teacher at my high school. Just seeing her swagger down the hallway in doc martins and faded jeans gave me hope enough to make it through another day.

Coming out for me, like so many others was incredibly dangerous. The price for queerness was extremely high – it cost me my home, family, and the community i’d grown up in.  And yet, queerness has given me more than I ever could have imagined in those dark closeted days.  Being out has afforded me a loving chosen family, work that I truly feel called to do, and so much more.  For me, there has been no greater freedom than being out, but I say that knowing that  I have and continue to be incredibly lucky. For far too many, coming out means falling through another set of cracks of  systems not designed to support our kids, and a community not ready to take them in.

Last year, for the month of October we started an online storytelling campaign called ‘Come Out, Kicked Out’ designed to provide an opportunity for folks in the community to write, draw, take a picture, or make a video coming out about their experiences with queer teen homelessness, and for allies within our community to stand up in solidarity with current and former homeless LGBTQ youth to talk about how they have seen this epidemic impacting their community.   Every day of October a different story was shared on our website with the idea of putting more faces and stories to this epidemic and to break down the profound stigma that still exists within the LGBTQ community about owning a history of teen homelessness or biological family disownment.  You can find all of last year’s incredible stories here.  If you find yourself inspired by the incredible stories shared last year we’re always looking for guest posts. Email your stories to kickedoutanthology@gmail.com

The thought I’d like to end with on Coming Out Day is the hope that when we as queer folks shout COME OUT! COME OUT!  we must be sure that we as a community are prepared not just pay lip service to welcoming those youth into our “family”  we must truly be prepared to open our  homes, wallets, ears and hearts to ensure that the youth who pay a heavy price for heeding our call are not abandoned by the very community they have lost everything to be part of.

One of the most incredible experiences I’ve had as a facilitator came this summer when I had the privilege  of partnering with Queers For Economic Justice to facilitate a summer writing intensive for folks involved in the Shelter Program.  The stories that came out of that workshop were absolutely incredible, and without a doubt some of the most powerful work I’ve ever witnessed.  There was a community reading at QEJ right after the workshop ended – you can read my reactions to that here.

I’m thrilled to announce  the writers from the summer writing intensive will be reading their work next week as part of a partnership with Dixon Place theater and the monthly Queer Text reading series!

Queer Text at Dixon Place presents Amber Hollibaugh of Queers for Economic Justice introducing Sassafras Lowrey and writers from her ‘Queer Shelter Project Stories Workshop’ as they bring their everyday experiences of queerness, homelessness, survival, and desire to the page, and now, to the stage.

Scheduled readers include Jay Toole, Clio, Dinick, and Gykyira. Event curated by Nicholas Boggs.

Doors at 7, reading at 7:30. $8 cash only (a portion of each ticket purchase is donated to Queers for Economic Justice).

Dixon Place is located on the Lower East Side at 161A Chrystie Street between Rivington and Delancey

I’m so excited that I had the chance to be a guest blogger at ‘I’m from driftwood’ today.  The premise of the site is queer folks writing stories about their life, and as part of that owning where they are from.

I was excited to have the opportunity to share part of  my story of being kicked out, family rejection, the building of chosen family, and the way in which being kicked out is a piece of our past that never goes away.    I really love the way the site connects us back to the places we come from — I grew up in an extremely homophobic county and so to discuss in such a public way who I am, what I experienced and to tie that back to where I come from is really powerful for me.  You can read the whole story   here

In many ways, Kicked Out is a YA book, though on the whole it resists being boxed in and tied to any one genre.   ‘Kicked Out’ is the book I desperately wanted when I was a homeless teenager, and so while of course I wanted the book to appeal to all readers, I wanted to specifically make sure I didn’t in anyway alienate teens who might come across the book, beyond that, I wanted it to specifically speak to them.  There is a special introduction/dedication ‘to the youth reading this book’ where I said:

“There are lots of people whom I hope will read this book: parents, educators, counselors and more. But the most important readers this book will ever have are you. This book is more for you than anyone else.”

When I say I wanted the book to specifically speak to LGBTQ teens I don’t mean that I wanted to in anyway limit the content to conform to some arbitrary definition of what equals “age appropriate.” Quite the contrary, I wanted it to be real.  I know that as a youth my friends and I was an expert at seeing through the bullshit that adults pushed in our face. The last thing I want to do is be the kind of adult that as a teen I saw as phony, condescending, and completely out of touch.

I was particularly troubled by an article I read last week where it was being argued that YA as a genre has become too “dark” full of violence, and abuse and that many of the books within the genre are not appropriate for teen readers. Essentially the author was arguing for censorship under the umbrella of what she calls “parenting.” I was left with deeper concerns. As a youth, the only LGBTQ teen representation that I found was positive, it was parents inviting their daughter’s girlfriend over for dinner, and baking cookies for their son’s GSA at school. It was about as far from my life as I could imagine. I will always remember how acutely painful it was to not be able to find my life reflected in any books. It’s part of why I was so honored that the American Library Association recognized Kicked Out as a top book for LGBTQ youth this year, and why  I’m so excited about being part of the NYPL event next weekabout LGBTQ YA books

I was thrilled this weekend to come across Sherman Alexie’s beautiful essay titled ‘Why the Best Kids Books Are Written in Blood’ about the power of bringing reality into the YA genre and responding to the concerns raised in the above mentioned article.   In this essay he talks about how books have the power to speak to youth, how he wishes desperately that the books he’d written, and all the others critiqued had been available to him when he needed them.    In general, identified incredibly strongly with all that Alexie wrote, but particularly this last paragraph:

“And now I write books for teenagers because I vividly remember what it felt like to be a teen facing everyday and epic dangers. I don’t write to protect them. It’s far too late for that. I write to give them weapons–in the form of words and ideas-that will help them fight their monsters. I write in blood because I remember what it felt like to bleed.” – Sherman Alexie

Teens don’t live easy lives. The “dark” themes that some think are “inappropriately” featured in some YA books are the reality of what teens have lived lived through, and the world they awake to every day. I remember how desperate I was to see any book that looked anything like my life and how devastated I was to never find it.  Youth consistently write me letters  come up to me at events to thank me, and talk about how what speaks to them most about ‘Kicked Out’ is the honesty. Again and again people talk about seeing their lives and their community reflected back to them for the first time in these pages.  How dare adults try to take that truth away from teen readers.